when traveling with other people for extended amounts of time, you can get a sense of what it would be like to live with them, abiet a brief glance. this is why, most of the time, i find myself understanding why i am married to who i am. i don't get tired of him and don't think that what he does is weird (o.k., he is weird, but not to THAT extent).
i guess i have only been in the relationships that i have been in. the one that i am in now, allows me to be frank about things. this is nice, for a couple of reasons, but most of all, because i've found it to be exhausting to NOT say things about things that i think may offend. i DO NOT, on a regular basis, say things to offend people...even when i'm speaking my mind.
what i've found however, is that, when people get married, apparently it is inexcusable and punishable by death if you think that someone else is remotely attractive.
we had instances this weekend where, t was looking at someone and so was his friend....in the process of this, his friend commented "we're going to hell". really? you are going to hell because you are GLANCING at some girls appendages that obviously she wanted you to look at because she pushed them up to her neck in hopes that someone would see them and give her some self-confidence? i had no idea that constituted the trip to hell.
another case: me and a friend are standing around after a race and quite literally, for the first time ever with this friend, i made a comment like, "that guy is really good looking, he's one of so-and-so's friend and he is also really nice". i got the vulcan death look (whatever that is) and a snippy comment to the effect of "i woudn't look at him...he's gay...just get him out of your head". WHAT?
last year, same trip, my friend was making a comment about something that she had done and said, "I looked exactly like that man there" I thought it was funny, as this man was about 12 inches shorter than she, and was very round. i said, jokingly, "you were a short, fat, bald man?" i got called a bitch, if i remember correctly. this year, we are at the expo, in that exact moment in that clip from the post before and out of nowhere i head, "wow, that news reporter is a fat ass, i mean, her ass is really big...ewww"
what is your experience in traveling with people or spending a lot of time around people other than those that you know every idiosyncracy about? do you edit yourself?
wow
when traveling with other people for extended amounts of time, you can get a sense of what it would be like to live with them, abiet a brief glance. this is why, most of the time, i find myself understanding why i am married to who i am. i don't get tired of him and don't think that what he does is weird (o.k., he is weird, but not to THAT extent).
i guess i have only been in the relationships that i have been in. the one that i am in now, allows me to be frank about things. this is nice, for a couple of reasons, but most of all, because i've found it to be exhausting to NOT say things about things that i think may offend. i DO NOT, on a regular basis, say things to offend people...even when i'm speaking my mind.
what i've found however, is that, when people get married, apparently it is inexcusable and punishable by death if you think that someone else is remotely attractive.
we had instances this weekend where, t was looking at someone and so was his friend....in the process of this, his friend commented "we're going to hell". really? you are going to hell because you are GLANCING at some girls appendages that obviously she wanted you to look at because she pushed them up to her neck in hopes that someone would see them and give her some self-confidence? i had no idea that constituted the trip to hell.
another case: me and a friend are standing around after a race and quite literally, for the first time ever with this friend, i made a comment like, "that guy is really good looking, he's one of so-and-so's friend and he is also really nice". i got the vulcan death look (whatever that is) and a snippy comment to the effect of "i woudn't look at him...he's gay...just get him out of your head". WHAT?
last year, same trip, my friend was making a comment about something that she had done and said, "I looked exactly like that man there" I thought it was funny, as this man was about 12 inches shorter than she, and was very round. i said, jokingly, "you were a short, fat, bald man?" i got called a bitch, if i remember correctly. this year, we are at the expo, in that exact moment in that clip from the post before and out of nowhere i head, "wow, that news reporter is a fat ass, i mean, her ass is really big...ewww"
what is your experience in traveling with people or spending a lot of time around people other than those that you know every idiosyncracy about? do you edit yourself?
i guess i have only been in the relationships that i have been in. the one that i am in now, allows me to be frank about things. this is nice, for a couple of reasons, but most of all, because i've found it to be exhausting to NOT say things about things that i think may offend. i DO NOT, on a regular basis, say things to offend people...even when i'm speaking my mind.
what i've found however, is that, when people get married, apparently it is inexcusable and punishable by death if you think that someone else is remotely attractive.
we had instances this weekend where, t was looking at someone and so was his friend....in the process of this, his friend commented "we're going to hell". really? you are going to hell because you are GLANCING at some girls appendages that obviously she wanted you to look at because she pushed them up to her neck in hopes that someone would see them and give her some self-confidence? i had no idea that constituted the trip to hell.
another case: me and a friend are standing around after a race and quite literally, for the first time ever with this friend, i made a comment like, "that guy is really good looking, he's one of so-and-so's friend and he is also really nice". i got the vulcan death look (whatever that is) and a snippy comment to the effect of "i woudn't look at him...he's gay...just get him out of your head". WHAT?
last year, same trip, my friend was making a comment about something that she had done and said, "I looked exactly like that man there" I thought it was funny, as this man was about 12 inches shorter than she, and was very round. i said, jokingly, "you were a short, fat, bald man?" i got called a bitch, if i remember correctly. this year, we are at the expo, in that exact moment in that clip from the post before and out of nowhere i head, "wow, that news reporter is a fat ass, i mean, her ass is really big...ewww"
what is your experience in traveling with people or spending a lot of time around people other than those that you know every idiosyncracy about? do you edit yourself?
2 comments:
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That's a tough one. Usually I don't edit myself. Either people like me or they don't. And if they don't like me ... in all likelihood, I'm not going to like them. So, why fake it.
I had one very memorable trip many years ago. A very good friend, J and I started to plan a trip to Europe. We invited M, a mutual friend (though I didn't know her all that well at the time). And J invited her friend, A, whom I didn't know at all. On the trip, J completely misbehaved. Acted childish. Was not a team player. And was starting to take a bite out of our good time (in Spain, no less!). After many days of this behavior, the rest of us gave up. We let her go off on her own. We stopped inviting her to join us. And by the end of the trip, she was no longer speaking to us. To this day? M, A and I remain very good friends. We haven't spoken to J in years. And while one could mourn the loss of J's friendship, I prefer to celebrate how close I became to M and A.
What I mean to convey is ... sometimes travel really does bring out the worst in people. -
September 22, 2009 at 11:03 AM
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I have tried to edit-myself around certain people, b/c I just didn't know them well enough, but alas, the true me always finds her way out. Luckily, I've become closer with people b/c they saw the real me and in turn they let the real them shine through too. We got each other.
I wish I was one of those blunt-say-whats-on-your-mind kind of people, but I'm not. I admit I am a person who can judge others at times, therefore, I figure I'm being judged as well.
I try not to travel with people that I feel I HAVE to edit myself around. At least not by myself. Dunno if that makes sense :-/ -
September 22, 2009 at 5:51 PM
Posts
2 comments:
That's a tough one. Usually I don't edit myself. Either people like me or they don't. And if they don't like me ... in all likelihood, I'm not going to like them. So, why fake it.
I had one very memorable trip many years ago. A very good friend, J and I started to plan a trip to Europe. We invited M, a mutual friend (though I didn't know her all that well at the time). And J invited her friend, A, whom I didn't know at all. On the trip, J completely misbehaved. Acted childish. Was not a team player. And was starting to take a bite out of our good time (in Spain, no less!). After many days of this behavior, the rest of us gave up. We let her go off on her own. We stopped inviting her to join us. And by the end of the trip, she was no longer speaking to us. To this day? M, A and I remain very good friends. We haven't spoken to J in years. And while one could mourn the loss of J's friendship, I prefer to celebrate how close I became to M and A.
What I mean to convey is ... sometimes travel really does bring out the worst in people.
I have tried to edit-myself around certain people, b/c I just didn't know them well enough, but alas, the true me always finds her way out. Luckily, I've become closer with people b/c they saw the real me and in turn they let the real them shine through too. We got each other.
I wish I was one of those blunt-say-whats-on-your-mind kind of people, but I'm not. I admit I am a person who can judge others at times, therefore, I figure I'm being judged as well.
I try not to travel with people that I feel I HAVE to edit myself around. At least not by myself. Dunno if that makes sense :-/
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