you hold standards of what you would expect in every serious romantic relationship that you have. or if you don't, i'm here to tell you, you should. but it got me to thinking, what standards, if any, do you hold to your friendships?
i have a tough time with this, because to me, it's all one and the same.
when we got married, i didn't announce it really.....to anyone, for a couple of reasons. 1. we went and signed a piece of paper that was between US. we didn't need anyone else there, and to be honest, didn't really WANT anyone else there. we did what was right for us. 2. my dad got sick at that time. it was NOT the time for celebration or for my issues to be overriding his and what was going on in my life. to be honest, and i'm not being mean, but i know that if i had to prioritize getting married vs. my dad almost dying...well, dad would win out.
after the whole thing with dad was over, my parents put out a christmas letter, full of cheer, and also full of the information that we were married. it was almost a side-note in the letter. this didn't set well with one of my friends. i got reeeeeeeeemed about it and about the fact that i had not told her.
after her own wedding, i think that she understood where i was coming from a bit. but i'd still get a snide comment about things here and there. well, she found out she was pregnant. three months ago. which is awesome....so amazing and exciting, i can hardly stand it. but the fact of the matter is, is that i have been talking to her throughout those months with NO MENTION of this. i'm more than o.k. with this...it's all about what the parents are comfortable with at this point and time, right. at least, that's my take on it. but then, i also found out that she found out about many people's situations, via, email and/or text, or not at all. i wonder....did they catch the wrath too?
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what standards are there in friendship?
you hold standards of what you would expect in every serious romantic relationship that you have. or if you don't, i'm here to tell you, you should. but it got me to thinking, what standards, if any, do you hold to your friendships?
i have a tough time with this, because to me, it's all one and the same.
when we got married, i didn't announce it really.....to anyone, for a couple of reasons. 1. we went and signed a piece of paper that was between US. we didn't need anyone else there, and to be honest, didn't really WANT anyone else there. we did what was right for us. 2. my dad got sick at that time. it was NOT the time for celebration or for my issues to be overriding his and what was going on in my life. to be honest, and i'm not being mean, but i know that if i had to prioritize getting married vs. my dad almost dying...well, dad would win out.
after the whole thing with dad was over, my parents put out a christmas letter, full of cheer, and also full of the information that we were married. it was almost a side-note in the letter. this didn't set well with one of my friends. i got reeeeeeeeemed about it and about the fact that i had not told her.
after her own wedding, i think that she understood where i was coming from a bit. but i'd still get a snide comment about things here and there. well, she found out she was pregnant. three months ago. which is awesome....so amazing and exciting, i can hardly stand it. but the fact of the matter is, is that i have been talking to her throughout those months with NO MENTION of this. i'm more than o.k. with this...it's all about what the parents are comfortable with at this point and time, right. at least, that's my take on it. but then, i also found out that she found out about many people's situations, via, email and/or text, or not at all. i wonder....did they catch the wrath too?
i have a tough time with this, because to me, it's all one and the same.
when we got married, i didn't announce it really.....to anyone, for a couple of reasons. 1. we went and signed a piece of paper that was between US. we didn't need anyone else there, and to be honest, didn't really WANT anyone else there. we did what was right for us. 2. my dad got sick at that time. it was NOT the time for celebration or for my issues to be overriding his and what was going on in my life. to be honest, and i'm not being mean, but i know that if i had to prioritize getting married vs. my dad almost dying...well, dad would win out.
after the whole thing with dad was over, my parents put out a christmas letter, full of cheer, and also full of the information that we were married. it was almost a side-note in the letter. this didn't set well with one of my friends. i got reeeeeeeeemed about it and about the fact that i had not told her.
after her own wedding, i think that she understood where i was coming from a bit. but i'd still get a snide comment about things here and there. well, she found out she was pregnant. three months ago. which is awesome....so amazing and exciting, i can hardly stand it. but the fact of the matter is, is that i have been talking to her throughout those months with NO MENTION of this. i'm more than o.k. with this...it's all about what the parents are comfortable with at this point and time, right. at least, that's my take on it. but then, i also found out that she found out about many people's situations, via, email and/or text, or not at all. i wonder....did they catch the wrath too?
1 comments:
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ahhhh...shame on you for hiding your marriage! I hate you , I hate you!!! just kidding... and oddly enough this friend you talk about (recently married, recently pregnant) sounds like me :-( so I don't know what to think...'cept that i'm not PG anymore LOL
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February 18, 2009 at 11:14 AM
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1 comments:
ahhhh...shame on you for hiding your marriage! I hate you , I hate you!!! just kidding... and oddly enough this friend you talk about (recently married, recently pregnant) sounds like me :-( so I don't know what to think...'cept that i'm not PG anymore LOL
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